Monday Morning Memo: In My Creator's Hands

“Should we call 911?”  That was a question I never dreamed I would be asked this past week.  If there is one thing I can say about my life, it is that it is never boring, but a question such as this isn’t one that anyone plans on being asked.

Let me explain.  For the past two weeks, we have been in North Carolina helping our daughter move into her new home.  While my husband did lots of painting, I cooked the meals and helped do some of the cleaning.  It was a joint effort, much was accomplished and we felt good about returning home this past Wednesday.

Then, Tuesday night happened.  I was already in my pajamas, sitting in the recliner watching my favorite TV show, completely relaxed.  I began feeling nauseated and my first thought was that I sure hoped I wasn’t coming down with the dreaded flu that has been going around.  With a 12-hour drive ahead of us the next day, being confined in a car didn’t sound like great surroundings for being sick.

Then it became more serious.  I suddenly had sharp pains in my jaw and then in my chest.  It felt like ropes were tied around me and I could feel my pulse increase rapidly.  I have had many things go wrong with my health over the years, but I had never felt anything close to this before.  I sat in the chair, thinking that it would just go away on its own.  But as the symptoms increased in intensity, I finally realized that I better let my husband and daughter know what I was feeling.

I calmly said, “Dan, I think I might be having a heart attack.”  In an instant, he flew off the couch and was by my side.  My daughter was immediately at my feet and had her phone poised as they asked the question, “Should we call 911?”  As much as I wanted to say no, the pain, along with my heart beating wildly in my chest told me that I should say yes.  Within minutes, I had first responders around my chair taking my vitals.

I won’t bore you with all the details, but I did get to take a “fun” ride in an ambulance and spend hours in a very busy emergency room.  The tests that were run didn’t show signs of a heart problem, but it was suggested that I see a cardiologist before we returned home.  The last thing any of us wanted was to get halfway to Indiana, in the middle of nowhere, and have something like this happen again.

We returned to our daughter’s home around 4:30 am Wednesday morning and decided that we would at least wait until Thursday to head home.  After a few hours, our daughter called and said that her boss, who is an orthopedic surgeon, agreed that we should see a cardiologist and knew of someone who might be able to work me into his schedule.  By the end of the day, we had an appointment to see this doctor on Thursday.  

We found out after we arrived at the cardiologist’s office, that it wasn’t even a day in which he was seeing patients.  He was doing procedures in the hospital, but as a favor to Erica’s boss, agreed to see me during his lunchtime.  He was such a kind, caring man and didn’t make me feel like I was interrupting his day at all.  He checked me over and said if we were willing to stay a couple more days, he would make a phone call to see if he could get me in for a nuclear stress test on Friday.  Before we left his office, we had the appointment scheduled for the following day, which our daughter’s boss said was almost unheard of…getting an appointment on such short notice.

As we walked out of his office, these words just kept going through my mind, “I am in my Creator’s hands”.  The One who knows the number of hairs on my head, knew at that moment what I was feeling, both physically and emotionally.  None of this was a surprise to Him and whatever the outcome, I knew that He was in control.  That didn’t mean that I wasn’t nervous.  Believe me, I was.  The unknown is often unsettling, but it makes a huge difference when you know the One who does know our tomorrow.

I had never had a stress test before, so I didn’t know what to expect.  But those who walked me through it at UNC were awesome.  They took such good care of me and three hours later I walked back out and then just had to wait until evening for the results.  Around 7:30 pm, my phone rang and it was the cardiologist himself.   He said that everything with my heart was just perfect and that I didn’t even have an ounce of calcium build-up in my arteries.  They were completely clear.  So while he didn’t know what had caused my episode, he did know that there was nothing wrong with my heart.

What a relief.   I felt so blessed at that moment because I knew that not everyone gets positive news after a test such as this.  For some reason, my Jesus had chosen to spare me any more heart tests and I was so thankful.

I’m sharing this with you today because maybe you are in a very stressful time also.  Maybe life has hit you with an unexpected health concern, job loss or family issue and your nerves are also on edge.  I want to urge you to remember that you are in your Creator’s hands.   He is holding onto you tightly and nothing that is happening is a surprise to Him.   Whatever the outcome, you can rest assured that He will see you through.  We saw Him work in such a mighty way this past week, as each detail fell into place, so we can attest to the fact that He won’t let you down.  So take a big breath and lean on the One who loves you more than you can imagine.  The One who created you and has you in His hands!

“Fear not, for I am with you;

be not dismayed, for I am your God;

I will strengthen you, I will help you,

I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.”

Isaiah 41:10