Oh, it was hard not to laugh. I knew I would just make him more upset if I even smiled…but it took everything within me to keep a straight face.
Zeke, our three-year-old grandson, had come running…crying. Through his wailing, he told me that Eli, his five-year-old brother, had slapped him in the mouth. Of course, as he told me this, Zeke slapped himself in the mouth to demonstrate what had taken place. It became comical when he kept showing me over and over again how he had been hit and he was slapping himself with quite a bit of force. Even when I told him that he didn’t have to keep showing me, he said, “Grandma, but this is what he did!”
Eli was called into the room and he admitted his transgression and apologized. All was well once again and they ran off and resumed their play. But I’m guessing that Zeke’s mouth stung for awhile…not because of the initial incident… but because of the continual demonstration that occurred afterwards!
We laugh at this, but how often do we do something similar to ourselves? Life can be painful and it probably isn’t real uncommon that someone hurts us with their words or actions. The pain from those times is real and I’m not trying to diminish the effects that it can have on us. But, if we are honest, I’m guessing there are times that we continue to bring it up over and over again…reliving the pain which in turns just makes it more anguishing for us. Even after there is an apology, it is so easy for us to just keep mulling it over and over again, until it consumes are entire day.
Forgiveness is such a hard thing to live out. Oh, we say we have forgiven someone, but actually demonstrating that forgiveness is often very difficult. I think we feel like the other person needs to suffer for their actions and so if we continually harp on it…they will endure the pain they deserve. We want to scream out to anyone that will listen, “But this is what he or she did to me!”
There are also the times when the other person never apologizes. Never admits any wrongdoing. Never comes to say they are sorry. Those times are difficult, and it is so easy to allow their transgressions to make our life miserable. We feel that releasing this pain will somehow let them “off the hook”, so we grasp it with clenched fists to hurt them, but all it does is hurt us.
I know that some of you have been through horrible events over the years and my heart grieves for you. You have had to endure more than your fair share of pain and hurt and you have been “slapped in the face” figuratively and maybe even literally. Getting past the anguish and moving on is so difficult. But I want to urge you today to take inventory of your thoughts and actions to see if maybe some of the things you are holding onto, as a result of this pain, need to be turned over to Jesus. Maybe instead of living it over and over again, you need to let Him take over and fill you to the brim with His peace.
Remember, giving it to Jesus doesn’t mean that what the other person did was right. It isn’t justifying their actions. It is you realizing that you won’t answer for anyone else, you will only answer for your response and your actions. Jesus is waiting for you to trust Him completely with your past, present and future, but to do so you will have to let go. Let Him have your pain and hurt today and allow Him to fill you anew with His Spirit.
I realize that sometimes it is even hard to know how to pray in this situation, so I’m sharing this Prayer of Forgiveness. Use it today and make the choice to give it all to Jesus. It won’t be easy…but it will be worth it!
“Get rid of all bitterness, rage, anger, harsh words, and slander, as well as all types of evil behavior. Instead, be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you.”
Ephesians 4:31-32
“I am leaving you with a gift—peace of mind and heart.
And the peace I give is a gift the world cannot give.
So don’t be troubled or afraid.”
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