It wasn’t a stellar morning. I woke up with a headache and just wanted to pull the covers over my head. But I had to get up to take medicine so the pounding in my head would go away…so I decided to proceed to my library to attempt my devotions.
What a sight I was. Puffy eyes from my headache…no makeup…hair a mess…and in my PJ’s. I opened my Bible and my reading for the day was in Numbers. If you know anything about that book…it’s not what I would call an exciting read. It contains many statistics, population counts, tribal and priestly figures, and other numerical data. I read where Numbers takes the reader on a “long and winding path through a desert of excruciating detail”...and that pretty much sums it up. It can be rather boring to say the least.
So, I’m sure I didn’t approach my reading with an open heart and listening ear that morning…I just wanted to be able to mark off that my reading was done for the day. I began reading in Numbers 28:
“The Lord said to Moses, “Give these instructions to the people of Israel: The offerings you present as special gifts are a pleasing aroma to me; they are my food. See to it that they are brought at the appointed times and offered according to my instructions.
“Say to the people: This is the special gift you must present to the Lord as your daily burnt offering. You must offer two one-year-old male lambs with no defects. Sacrifice one lamb in the morning and the other in the evening. With each lamb you must offer a grain offering of two quarts of choice flour mixed with one quart of pure oil of pressed olives. This is the regular burnt offering instituted at Mount Sinai as a special gift, a pleasing aroma to the Lord. Along with it you must present the proper liquid offering of one quart of alcoholic drink with each lamb, poured out in the Holy Place as an offering to the Lord. Offer the second lamb in the evening with the same grain offering and liquid offering. It, too, is a special gift, a pleasing aroma to the Lord.”
That’s as far as I got in my reading…before my eyes filled with tears. I felt so overwhelmed that I couldn’t go on. Why? Because it hit me how blessed I am. Because of my Jesus, who was willing to be beat…spit on…laughed at…tortured…and then hung on a tree and crucified….I don’t have to do all those things that were required back in Moses’ day. Jesus became my sacrifice for my sins…so I don’t have to bring a lamb…or a grain offering…or pure oil…to be in His presence. I could come to Him just like I was…with a headache…puffy eyes and no makeup…hair a mess…and yes, even in my PJ’s.
This time in Numbers also made me ask myself if my time spent with Him was a “pleasing aroma”. Did it please Him that my goal was just to mark off that day’s assigned reading? Did it smell good to Him that I approached His Word rather grudgingly…just wanting to skim through the “desert of excruciating detail”? I knew what His answer would be…and I felt so ashamed.
Fast forward a couple of days and I attended a basketball game for our 6-year-old grandson. I walked over to hang up my coat and as I looked down the hallway, our 4-year-old grandson was running as fast as he could towards me and I heard him yell, “Grandma…I missed you!” Oh, what joy that brought my heart and I felt so loved.
As I thought about this later…this devotional time came flooding back to my mind. Am I as eager to spend time with my Jesus…as my grandson was to spend time with me? Do I look forward to reading His Word…spending time in prayer…listening for His direction in my life? Do I run to Him with eager anticipation of basking in His presence? Does my attitude bring joy to His heart and make Him feel loved?
I should have been the one on that tree instead of Jesus. I am the one who has sinned over and over again and has, I’m sure, caused Him so much pain and sorrow. But He did it anyway because He loves me that much and do you know what? He loves you that much too. He loves us so deeply that He was willing to do whatever it took to give us the opportunity for eternal life. Jesus became our sacrifice so we could walk with Him each and every day and then spend eternity with Him. That is something I can’t even fathom or comprehend.
If you aren’t spending time with Jesus every day…I want to urge you to begin doing so. Trust me…you don’t have to clean yourself up inside or outside beforehand…He wants you to come as you are…and allow Him to speak to you. You just never know what He will use to fill you to the brim and overflowing. If He can use a “long and winding path through a desert of excruciating detail” to speak to me…I know He can speak to you too 😊
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