Monday, October 17, 2016

Monday Morning Memo: Change Begins at Home

I was reminded this past week that what I say and how I act is often watched by others.  We were blessed to have our two-year-old grandson Elias stay with us for a few days and it never ceases to amaze me how much he picks up from those around him.

We were watching Wheel of Fortune together (yes, I know that proves I’m old!) and one of the contestants solved a puzzle with only two letters showing.  I immediately looked at my husband and said, “How did she do that?”  He of course had no clue how she did it either and we continued to watch the show.

We were so surprised then when after the next puzzle was solved, Elias said, “Grandma, how did she do that?” using the same exact flex in his voice that I had used…putting an emphases on the word “do”.  I looked over at him and it was obvious that he was quite proud of himself for talking just like the grownups!

It’s so cute when he copies something I say or do…most of the time.  But I’m confident that there will be times when it won’t be so cute.  He is watching my every move and hearing my spoken words and I’m pretty sure they won’t always have a positive effect on him.  He is a very smart little boy and I’m guessing that he believes that if grandma behaves in a certain way, it is fine for him to do the same. 

I have heard and read a lot this past week in the media about making sure our children know what is acceptable and what isn’t acceptable.  Many have written articles about how they want to make sure their children know what kind of talk and behavior is appropriate and I couldn’t agree more.  What bothers me though is that many of us are often quick to point out the bad behavior of others to our children, but we fail to make sure that our behavior is what it should be.

Our children and grandchildren are often much smarter than what we give them credit.  What will they think if they hear us telling them not to mimic others, all while we ourselves are not speaking or doing as we should.  We can talk all day about how they should respect their bodies and not allow others to degrade them…but are they getting mixed messages when we are first in line to purchase a book such as Fifty Shades of Grey?  How much will it confuse them if we tell them one thing, but then spend our Saturday night at the latest “R” rated movie that is filled with sexual content?  And, probably the most sobering, how can we tell our children about their worth in God’s eyes, but then condone the killing of innocent babies before they have even had the opportunity to take their first breath on this earth?

So much is going on around us in this world today that is completely out of our control and it is having a huge influence on our children.  Because of this, it is critical that what they see us doing doesn’t conflict with what they hear us saying.  If we tell them that having a relationship with Christ should be our main focus, then they need to see us making it a priority in our life.  If they see that we are too busy to spend time daily with Him or that attending a sporting event or going to the lake often takes precedence over being in church on Sunday…our words won’t have much impact.  If they hear us saying that they need to choose their words wisely but hear us gossiping and using foul or vulgar talk…we might as well not share our words of “wisdom” with them.  And if we tell them that Jesus loves the little children and that they are precious in His sight…we better be willing to do whatever we can to stop the murdering that is going on of innocent lives of the unborn because they are an “inconvenience” to the parent.    

Changing our world begins at home, but if our children are receiving mixed messages from us, how can we expect them to make the right choices and live a life that is pleasing to the Lord.  They must see Him in us first…in our words and in our actions.  May God help us have the courage to make sure what we do is in line with what we say.

 “Write these commandments that I’ve given you today on your hearts. Get them inside of you and then get them inside your children.
Talk about them wherever you are, sitting at home or walking in the street; talk about them from the time you get up in the morning to when you fall into bed at night. Tie them on your hands and foreheads as a reminder; inscribe them on the doorposts of your homes and on your city gates.”
Deuteronomy 6:6-9 The Message

 “And you yourself must be an example to them by doing good works of every kind. Let everything you do reflect the integrity and seriousness of your teaching. Teach the truth so that your teaching can’t be criticized. Then those who oppose us will be ashamed and have nothing
bad to say about us.”
Titus 2:7-8 New Living Translation


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