I was reminded this past week that what I say and how I act is
often watched by others. We were blessed
to have our two-year-old grandson Elias stay with us for a few days and it
never ceases to amaze me how much he picks up from those around him.
We were watching Wheel of Fortune together (yes, I know that
proves I’m old!) and one of the contestants solved a puzzle with only two
letters showing. I immediately looked at
my husband and said, “How did she do that?”
He of course had no clue how she did it either and we continued to watch
the show.
We were so surprised then when after the next puzzle was solved,
Elias said, “Grandma, how did she do that?” using the same exact flex in his
voice that I had used…putting an emphases on the word “do”. I looked over at him and it was obvious that
he was quite proud of himself for talking just like the grownups!
It’s so cute when he copies something I say or do…most of the
time. But I’m confident that there will
be times when it won’t be so cute. He is
watching my every move and hearing my spoken words and I’m pretty sure they
won’t always have a positive effect on him.
He is a very smart little boy and I’m guessing that he believes that if grandma
behaves in a certain way, it is fine for him to do the same.
I have heard and read a lot this past week in the media about
making sure our children know what is acceptable and what isn’t
acceptable. Many have written articles
about how they want to make sure their children know what kind of talk and
behavior is appropriate and I couldn’t agree more. What bothers me though is that many of us are
often quick to point out the bad behavior of others to our children, but we
fail to make sure that our behavior is what it should be.
Our children and grandchildren are often much smarter than what
we give them credit. What will they
think if they hear us telling them not to mimic others, all while we ourselves
are not speaking or doing as we should.
We can talk all day about how they should respect their bodies and not
allow others to degrade them…but are they getting mixed messages when we are
first in line to purchase a book such as Fifty
Shades of Grey? How much will it
confuse them if we tell them one thing, but then spend our Saturday night at
the latest “R” rated movie that is filled with sexual content? And, probably the most sobering, how can we
tell our children about their worth in God’s eyes, but then condone the killing
of innocent babies before they have even had the opportunity to take their
first breath on this earth?
So much is going on around us in this world today that is
completely out of our control and it is having a huge influence on our
children. Because of this, it is
critical that what they see us doing doesn’t conflict with what they hear us
saying. If we tell them that having a
relationship with Christ should be our main focus, then they need to see us
making it a priority in our life. If
they see that we are too busy to spend time daily with Him or that attending a
sporting event or going to the lake often takes precedence over being in church
on Sunday…our words won’t have much impact.
If they hear us saying that they need to choose their words wisely but
hear us gossiping and using foul or vulgar talk…we might as well not share our
words of “wisdom” with them. And if we
tell them that Jesus loves the little children and that they are precious in
His sight…we better be willing to do whatever we can to stop the murdering that
is going on of innocent lives of the unborn because they are an “inconvenience”
to the parent.
Changing our world begins at home, but if our children are
receiving mixed messages from us, how can we expect them to make the right
choices and live a life that is pleasing to the Lord. They must see Him in us first…in our words and in our actions. May God help us have the courage to make sure
what we do is in line with what we say.
“Write these commandments that I’ve given you
today on your hearts. Get them inside of you and then get them inside your
children.
Talk about them
wherever you are, sitting at home or walking in the street; talk about them
from the time you get up in the morning to when you fall into bed at night. Tie
them on your hands and foreheads as a reminder; inscribe them on the doorposts
of your homes and on your city gates.”
Deuteronomy 6:6-9 The
Message
“And you yourself must be an example to them
by doing good works of every kind. Let everything you do reflect the integrity
and seriousness of your teaching. Teach the truth so that your teaching can’t
be criticized. Then those who oppose us will be ashamed and have nothing
bad to say about us.”
Titus 2:7-8 New Living
Translation
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